'War Babies' by Graeme Garden and Bill Oddie

In 1939, on the eve of War, a housewife gives birth to a fully-grown and fully-bearded Bill. Two years later, Bill’s mother and father evacuate him to ‘Highbrow Hall’, a boarding school for young geniuses, where he meets another ‘boy’ his age, Graeme, and a ‘baby’ named Tim. Together they are sent by the headmaster on a mission for none other than Winston Churchill, to go behind enemy lines and buy the Prime Minister a box of cigars. When the trio are dropped from a plane into Germany, Bill and Graeme land safely – but Tim is smashed to bits, having given his parachute to his teddy bear. After collecting up the pieces of Tim, Bill and Graeme manage to elude the German soldiers and purchase Churchill’s cigars; they then hide out in a hotel, where Graeme rebuilds Tim into the world’s first clockwork baby. Returning to England, the trio go straight to Chequers to present the P.M. with his cigars – and are astonished to find that Churchill looks exactly like Adolf Hitler. The Prime Minister explains that up until recently his looks haven’t been a problem, but now that he is being asked to make public appearances, he needs someone to go in his place – and so Tim is equipped with a recording of Churchill in his bionic voicebox, and sent out to inspire the troops…

Bill Oddie (Bill), Tim Brooke-Taylor (Tim), Graeme Garden (Graeme), Sharon Miller (Matron), Andrew Ray (Winston Churchill), Geoffrey Palmer (Headmaster Perce P. Cassidy)

Produced and Directed by Bob Spiers
Music by Bill Oddie and Dave McRae

TX (BBC 2):
18th February 1980

Notes:
*Featuring Tim, Bill and Graeme